Mama's Musings

Isn't it ironic?

Why didn't my mama tell me that life's little ironies are what it's all about? Such as the fact that I got a call from my casting agency offering me a role in a movie called Email to Happiness (wasn't I just trying to unplug - I mean full out, not gonna be hanging on the Internet all summer, type offline groove - and now I'm playing in a movie about emailing to happiness or the pursuit thereof?). Or that my son's alleged water gun wasn't working, until we switched, and suddenly he sprayed me square between the eyes?

Alanis Morissette's little ditty, Ironic, reminds us all that we sometimes miss the bus. The irony is there is something better in store (such as a stretch limo replete with champagne and a cozy dinner for two?).

Yes, I think so.

Stressed spelled backwards

My sister sent me this ~the author is not known, but the message certainly is!

 

Can't eat pork,

Swine flu...

Can't eat chicken,

Bird flu.

Can't eat Beef,

Mad cow....

Can't eat eggs,

Salmonella.

Can't eat fish,

 heavy metal poisons in their waters.

Can't eat fruits and veggies,

insecticides and herbicides.

Hmmmmmmmmm!!!!!!!!!!!!!

M

M

M

M

M

M

M

M

M

M

M

I believe that leaves Chocolate and ice cream!!!!!!!!

Remember - - - 'STRESSED'

spelled backwards! is

'DESSERTS'

Love What Is

Byron Katie says love what is. Eckhardt Tolle (A New Earth) says love the NOW, it's all there is. Jesus says "turn the other cheek." Oprah says live your best life. But I ask myself: Do/did any of these people have children?

During a rather tumultuous afternoon with my prepubescent daughter and trotting-close-to-her-heels (in attitude) son, I wondered what was lovable about two children screeching at me for no apparent reason.

"I want to play soccer," is my seven-year-old son's standard line. Perhaps in fifteen years, when he's playing the Big Leagues, I will smile back to these moments of pure torture that two hours on the field plus another twenty-five minutes in the house batting the ball around simply weren't enough. Or my near ten-year-old daughter tossing a stinging remark about how I never wait for her but how she has to wait for me as I stand panting at the top of the hill with my bike waiting for them all to catch up.

Not really loving what is right now. But, as Eckhardt so lovingly says, This too shall pass. Or was it Jesus?

Big Mamas on the Town

My mom arrived at the hotel a few hours ago. We're going to rock it out tonight. We are celebrating her birthday and mine.

Life as a Big Mama on the town is good! I met Joel Osteen at an event the other night. We're going to see him speak at Yankee Stadium. Weather report? 80 degrees.

Yes, life is indeed good!

5 Random Things about the Universe

So five random things happened in the past twenty-four hours that tell me the Universe has something planned. You know the feeling? You might spend years thinking you're an aimless wanderer on the planet, and then, boom. You get an insight, or in my case, five, that amaze you, Universe-style.

Random Thing #1: The distribution center for my big-time-how-do-you-do New York publisher is located less than a mile from my house in Gordonsville, VA.

Random Thing #2: The very delivery guy who picked up my hand-edited manuscript crossed my path today in Munich at virtually the very same place I met him almost a month ago to send it off.

Random Thing #3: My Munich client was planning on attending a book-signing in California next week. The California author she wants to see happens to be my new client. My Munich client had no idea.

Random Thing #4: My new client introduced me to 'someone in Germany' who does book tour events. He is located miles from my house here.

Random Thing #5: The set next to the place where we were filming a cop show today got blown up. They needed to hire new talent and killed off a bunch of characters in one ka-boom.

Universe - I'm listening.

Honest to pete.

Easter Break - Week 2

We're well into Week 2 of the kids' Easter holiday break and I have to say I'm sad it's going to be over soon. My kids have enjoyed the a-ma-zing weather and lack of schedule. We've woken up every morning and asked ourselves "What shall we do today?"

Jackson is writing song lyrics. Sophia is playing with a friend who dropped by out of the blue. Pizza is in the oven, and life is easy.

Ah, would that it were more often this way! 

That'll be Italian ice cream, please

Sunshine warms not only the face, but also the heart. The kids and I were so motivated by the sun's rays yesterday that we bought terrace plants, short-sleeved shirts, and an ice cream cone to celebrate.

As we rolled down the escalator of the department store with shopping bag in hand, the kids spotted an ice cream cart in the store. I suggested we get some there.

"Oh no!" they shouted in concert. "We don't want just any old ice cream. We want Italian ice cream!"

Since when did their lives get this good? Living near Italy has its benefits. We found the next Italian ice cream cart just paces away. Lucky for them! And they were right. It does taste better than most!

Snark Attack - Home Alone

My kids are at that age where they have started to like being home alone. To a certain extent. Mom has to run an errand? Without me! Dad's gone until 5 pm? Perfect. We've been able to get away to the theater on a Friday night once -- at the kids' request.

"You go have a good time. We're going to have fun kid time!" It was a win-win and bowled us over til Sunday.

I am actually quite confident my kids can handle a certain amount of home alone time. They know how to reach me or their father in case of emergency, we have plenty of neighbors who could lend a helping hand in immediate situations, and there comes a time when getting a babysitter to attend a parent-teacher meeting seems counterintuitive.

But when it comes to having friends over when we are not here or, for that matter, going to an unsupervised household at a friend's place, I remain firm. I let my daughter go to a friend's house without adult supervision for an hour before the mother came home once. It went fine, but that's because her younger brother (read: hyper-energetic bundle of boyness) wasn't there.

So when my daughter got invited to that same girl's house with the promise that her father would get home two hours after they did and the likelihood that the brother would be there, too, I asked to speak to an adult in the house. The mother got on the phone, not promising me her husband really would be home on time. "Who knows when he'll really arrive. He said 3 pm..." That's when I backpedaled. I explained I didn't think my daughter was up for it. She started to question every word I said until I cut off the conversation by saying "This is the third interruption in the last ten minutes. First, the chimney sweeper. Then a neighbor. Now this. I have to cook. Bah-bye now..." and I hung up the phone. I felt awful, but the woman just couldn't hear anything other than what she wanted to hear -- that her own kids wouldn't be alone all afternoon.

I talked to my kids about it. They agreed it felt strange to be in a situation that didn't feel safe. What truly matters is what my kids feel and think. The rest of the world can go jump in the lagoon!

What's a momshell?

"Never leave the house without your lipstick and pearls," my grandmother would say. As long as you had those things, she claimed, you were considered fully dressed. She was of an era of up-dos and crinolin. She had class, style, and charisma.

The Associated Press recently asked me what I thought about the term 'momshell'. Quite honestly, I had never heard of the word before. But it says a lot about self-care today. We women want to be visible even when we have children.

I remember the first time I felt invisible. All eyes were on the baby, and I was the backdrop. It felt strange, and oddly comforting, as if I didn't have to be on display anymore, sporting a size 4 or sucking in my stomach to look like all those 18-year-old models. Being pregnant liberated me from belts and other restrictive clothing.

Then came the transition into toddlerhood, when the children and my parenting became more transparent. Their behavior reflected on me, and suddenly I became centerstage again. Only this time the stage was cluttered with rotten tomatoes thrown at us non-perfect moms.

Momshells are women who care for themselves, who want to look and feel good. I mentioned Michelle Obama as an example of someone who is beautiful inside and out and who has made the sacrifices of motherhood more visible. That, to me, is beauty in motion. And a dash of lipstick couldn't hurt.

A letter to my kids

I originally posted this on DarynKagan.com. Perhaps you might enjoy it, too.

~~

Dear Kids,

I know it's not easy living in a country that doesn't speak your mother tongue (or your mother's tongue, for that matter). But you speak their language beautifully, and even when the teacher gets mad that you've not conformed the way she wants you to, you keep that gorgeous spirit of triumph and creativity alive.

Thank you for being such great friends to those who love you, even when you don't get along. You are learning to treat each other with kindness, and that's not always easy. Thank you for noticing what it means to treat people with dignity, such as when that man dropped his groceries at the top of the escalator and I gave him my shopping bag so he had something to carry them in. I loved how your eyes lit up with recognition and how you reminded me of it days later.

Thank you for saying "Go to the theater, we'll be just fine" and meaning it.

Thank you for doing your homework without my asking, then thanking me for giving you the space to decide when to do it.

Thank you for cleaning your rooms and generating positive energy in our living space.

Thank you for asking for one more Bubbly Bobbly story. He loves mischief, and so do you!

Thank you for hugging me just when I need it and for asking for a hug when you need one, too.

Thank you for the extra play money when we play Monopoly just to make it more fun  (and affordable!).

Thank you for the care you give the guinea pigs, who we all know are children #3 & #4.

Thank you for the pictures you draw that depict your mind's eye. It is beautiful. In fact, so are you.

With all my love,
Mama