Mama's Musings

Weekend of Miracles

We are nearing the end of our weekend (while you may still have all of Sunday ahead of you). It has been one of most satisfying weekends I've had in a long time. It's not because we did much of anything; it was more the way in which we did things that has granted me the serenity to know the difference between this and other Sunday evenings that have made me grateful for Monday mornings.

It may have started on Friday afternoon when I decided to make a dish my kids had never eaten before. I knew I was treading on thin ice; my daughter and I had been on tenuous terms about, well, whatever. But I had a feeling if I didn't start cooking new things, my kids would forever be stuck in their three-meal rut. And I'd grow in my resentment of it.

And so I served up broccoli in a chicken cream sauce. Further, I tossed in a few mushrooms, too. After an initial stink, my kids actually tried it. My daughter even ate both broccoli sprigs with an audible "Yum!" thrown in for good measure. And she wasn't faking it because Lord knows she won't fake anything that has to do with questionable food.

The culinary miracles continued as I got a sudden hankering for cheese cake ~ not just any cheese cake. It would have to be a home-made one. So I whipped out a recipe and started baking. At one point, I could hear the silent satisfaction of my family as they read in the kitchen to the rhythm of my electric beater. It was as if they thought As long as Mama's got that thing in her hands, she's not boarding a plane any time soon. Two hours later I served up my husband with the most delicious cheese cake with mandarins I had ever made (I think it was my third in this lifetime). And today, after spending two glorious hours reading while my daughter had her riding lesson, I donned my apron one more time to make a lamb stew with curry because my husband, The Cook, wasn't home from the pool with our son yet.

It's not that I'm trying to trump my husband, who is the singularly most fabulous cook on the planet. It's merely a need I have to nest as the days grow dim. I even made a few Christmas ornaments with the kids this evening.

Dag. The power of slow brings magic at every turn. I am so very grateful for the beauty that has ensued because of it.

Love means you really should say you're sorry

Even though my eyes seemed stuck to the back of their sockets in a weirdish, inverted position, I slowly rolled with a groan lept from the bed and into the shower this morning. It was my daughter's first day back to school after fall break, and I had promised her I would drive her to school at the ungodly hour of 6:50 am. She had lain in a puddle of tears the night before, casting off some mean girl saga I missed while I was traipsing about the universe sprinkling messages of slow and abundance.

So here we were, sitting on the kitchen floor and sorting through school supplies and my daughter's feelings to get to the bottom of things.

"And the worst part? She never even apologized!" my daughter exclaimed. I guess she was used to apologies being the normal ending to conflicts. Not so in the real world, I told her. We say we're sorry, but not everyone learns that courtesy.

I am roughly 27 hours into the full-time motherhood/work-from-home consultant gig, and I already feel worse for wear. Some of it has to do with residual jet lag. The other part has to do with getting back into the swing of things after a few weeks on travel. You can never fully simulate the feelings to marrow-deep exhaustion when you are away from home. It's only when you get there that you realize how much energy is required to keep the ship at an even keel.

Luckily, my kids are used to hearing and saying 'I'm sorry.' We've had a lot of practice, and my guess is it won't be the last time they hear it from me!

Kitchen Beast

Today I fought the battle with Kitchen Beast and lost.

It seems no matter how much sponge whippery I conduct, there is just no taming it. Pots, pans, sticky unidentifiable goo...terracotta-colored tiles dotted with crumbs, cackling wickedly as they foil my plans for a tolerable level of cleanliness.

I am not talking absolutes here. There are indeed degrees of neatness. Some people have a high scum tolerance. They can overlooked days-old bread standing at attention, the plastic bag open with flies buzzing above it. Ewww.

Others scrub their floors daily for that extra sparkle.

I am neither one. I just want my feet not to crunch when I walk across the floor. Okay? It's not asking much, but it is asking something.

So when my kids dash off after lunch in a collective state of amnesia as to where the dishwasher is actually located (behind them), I get ancy. Kitchen Beast prowls beyond its cage and does a Happy Dance, knowing my upper-hand is slipping fast. I run for the wash rag, swirl around in fury and stare it down into obedience. That's usually around the time my husband gets home. Something tells me he has a secret pact with Kitchen Beast because everytime he's home, the kitchen is at its worst.

While the rest of the world mocks me for my yearning for order, my family smiles complacently and says, "Yes, Mom..." then just when I'm not looking, the dishwasher has been emptied and filled with that which had littered the countertops.

I am indeed not alone. Perhaps befriending Kitchen Beast would be the first step?

A dollar short and a decade too late

Imagine the loudest noise ever. Add emotional agony. Mix with rising oil prices.

That's the sound of my emotional state right now, folks. You get the picture.

My energy expert friend did me a favor recently and assessed our new house for its energy efficiency. Sitting down with a freshly brewed espresso, he looked me squarely in the eye and said,

"Well, Christine, energy-wise you live in a tent."

He dovetailed his comment with all the wonderful things we could do to make our home more environmentally friendly to the tune of $100,000. But did he take into account the amount of carbon dioxide I'd have to give off just to make that kind of cash?

Nyet.

So this morning, with all the good will I could muster, I peered into our heating room and listened to our burner purring nicely, until I realized it was probably using more oil than it should and that it is consuming at a rate acceptable for the year it was built (1990), but for today's standards eats up more like a dollar of oil per minute. We'll either have to remodel our home or use the same money to send our kids to college.**

Perhaps we should just move into a real tent and power our lives from solar energy. That is, if the sun ever comes out in Germany again. Thunder showers are in the forecast for the next week. Energy-wise a real bummer. At least this house is water proof!

**Editor's Note: To all friends and family, I am exaggerating here for the sake of entertainment. The children will get an education. Honest.

Time Tip Giveaway #6 - Family Calendar

Family life can be off-the-wall so why not get a Whomi On the Wall Calendar to organize your days? The Whomi on the Wall Family Calendar ($9) uses a  color-coded system so you can track the activities of up to four family members, day by day, all in the same view. And we're giving away three** of them!! Deadline is March 22nd. Winners will be notified via email on Monday, March 24th.

To enter leave a comment below and subscribe to my parenting newsletter.

Fill out your e-mail address to receive our newsletter!

We promise never to rent, sell or give away your personal information. Ever.

**US and Canada only

Good luck!

CONGRATS TO CINDI, AMANDA and KRISTIN FOR WINNING!!

Spring Cleaning

How many of you actually get the spring cleaning bug? As the temperature gauge rises, do you get an itch for your rubber gloves and a sudsy bucket of water?

To me, there's nothing more motivating than a few buds bursting on the trees and birds singing their spring song.

My son came home from school today and got the shock of his life.

"Mom, you're vacuuming my room," he gingerly placed his backpack next to his desk. "Are you feeling okay?"

He knows I have a hired helper who cleans the house once a week. In fact, he's no longer accustomed to my rolling up my sleeves to do something as mundane as sweep under the dining room table. Except I do, almost every day. He just doesn't see it because he himself is too busy making the mess I later put aside.

I'm ashamed to admit I actually straighten up before the cleaning lady comes. She just seems to do a better job when the floors are cleared of our typical pile of junk. Sick, huh?

Google Goggles

Life is a lot like Google. You intend to find one thing, then typically end up with something entirely different. Such as when my mom declared as innocent as a newborn that we should move after hearing my laments about how tiny our current house is.

Being a dutiful daughter, I googled 'new house' and the name of the town we're currently living in, and promptly found the house of our dreams three streets away.

I won't lie to you. It wasn't really as simple as that, and if you ever buy a house in Germany, be prepared for lots of visits to somber-looking buildings with people who seemed cheered by digits, facts, figures and plot numbers. Yes, my husband and I are entering the world of lawyers, lenders, and lawn boys. It's an exciting, and daunting, step.

Moving, they say, is one of the top ten reasons to find life a wee bit stressful. Never mind we're only moving 300 meters from our current house. In the world of banks and home improvement stores, we might as well be moving to Sweden.

Given the stressful ambience around shifting our worldly possessions from one house to the next, it's only natural we would wish to weed out some of the less empowering items in the house, such as the misshapen towels stuffed towards the backs of closets that found no joy in our home. Or the expensive, ignored toys of our children's early days.

Determined to make our move a resolute and lucrative experience, I did what any enterprising housewife would do. I took a few digital shots of my saleable wares and plopped them on eBay. Pretty soon everything in our house got scrutinized with my eBay Eagle Eye.

"Think anyone would want this?" my husband asked, holding up the handle bars from his 1997 mountain bike. I smiled warmly, encouraged by his enthusiastic, yet clueless embrace of our eBay venture.

"Why don't we just put that in the Goodwill pile, hon?" I remarked gently. We gathered toys, clothes, outgrown costumes and a few electronics in working condition. Then I set to work, writing irresistible, vivid copy for each of our sale items.

I'm no financial wizardress, but I must tell you what joy I find watching our unwanted things soar to a respectable sales price on the world's wildest online auction house.

"Hey gang! Rapunzel Barbie is up to two bucks!" I shouted happily while the TV droned on downstairs. Other than the sound of a cartoon and size-three feet slapping the wall with boob-tube-drunken regularity, I got no response.

This week I have sixteen items for sale, and I have found myself checking their status more than I check my email. Occasionally, I'd let out a "Golly Whoop!" when another bidder attempted to stake her claim over our stuff. In today's complicated world, my friends, it's the little things that count.

As for Google, I think my mom had meant something else by suggesting we move. But, Mama, at least it's not Sweden!

When You Buy a New Home

John Brennan has some great ideas on home-buying tips. We're buying a new house right now so it was helpful to read his article. Hope you enjoy it!

Tips for Buying a New Home

With Due Diligence, You can Protect your Health and Save Thousands in Potential Environmental-Cleanup Costs

Purchasing a new home is a busy and exciting time with a lot of responsibilities and usually a long to-do list.  One of the most crucial items is to ensure that you have a proper environmental home inspection performed so that you are not burdened with expensive cleanup fees after the closing.  The first step is to hire a reputable home inspection firm and insist on careful evaluation of any environmental issues that might be present in or under the house, or on the property.  The results of such an inspection should be reviewed with the seller and resolved prior to the sale.  The next step is to retain a competent environmental consulting firm to resolve any issues that are discovered during the inspection.  The responsibility for the costs of any remediation work should be clearly stated in the agreement of sale.

John Brennan, President of Brennan Environmental, Inc. offers tips on how to complete your environmental due diligence prior to closing on a house.  “These relatively simple guidelines will save you money and ease your mind through the home buying process,” said Mr. Brennan.

Outside the house:

·       Underground storage tanks: If the home is or ever was heated by oil from an underground storage tank, it should be tested for leakage or decommissioned if no longer in use. Soil samples from near the tank also should be tested for contamination. Cleanup from leaking underground storage tanks is very costly.  Furthermore, make sure to get leak insurance for any active heating oil tanks on the property.

·       Private wells:  If the home has a private well, a water test for contamination and safety should be conducted, as it is harmful to drink contaminated water.

·       Septic Systems: Homes using a septic system or similar soil absorption system should be tested prior to purchase to avoid costly upgrade and replacement and to avoid unsanitary or dangerous site conditions from abandoned septic systems.

Inside the house:

·       Asbestos:  Flooring, walls, ceiling tiles, boilers and pipes should be tested for asbestos, which becomes problematic if asbestos-containing materials crumble, flake or deteriorate through activities like cleaning, accidental damage or renovation.

·       Radon gas:  A screening should be conducted, especially in the lower levels of the house.  Radon is a cancer-causing radioactive gas that is undetectable by human senses.

·       Lead:  Interior and exterior painted surfaces should be tested for the presence of lead.  This holds especially true for any building that was built prior to 1978.  Lead enters the dust and air inside a home when surfaces with lead-based paint deteriorate or are scraped, sanded or heated in paint stripping procedures.  Lead can also be present in water lines in which lead based solder was used.

·       Mold:  Wood, ceiling tiles, wallpaper, carpets and insulation should be inspected for mold.  Mold can cause respiratory illness and allergic reactions and is usually a sign of unacceptably high moisture levels in a home.

John Brennan is the President of Brennan Environmental, Inc. an environmental consulting firm located in Summit, N.J.  The company’s growing roster of Northeast clients covers a broad range of law firms, real estate brokerages, as well as insurance, engineering and financial institutions.  BEI’s dedication to quality consulting in today’s ever-changing environmental climate has resulted in solid client relationships, many lasting for the past decade. 

A house is not our home

It's been an extremely eventful two weeks. Why? Because I got fed up, then did something about it.

For five years we've lived in relatively cramped quarters. It was okay in the beginning, before our container arrived with all our worldly possessions. It was fun to run about the unfurnished living room and chase my then preschooler and toddler. As they grew, so did their belongings. Suddenly, we were not only housing several sofas, tables, chairs and settees, but also toys, guinea pigs and stuffed horses and two grade-school kids who prefer to play with the ironing board and coffee table than the toys in their tiny crowded bedrooms.

After knocking my knees on a laundry basket full of junk, I pulled the plug mentally.

"We've got to move!" I cried from the top of the stairs. My voice echoed down the stairwell to the basement where my husband was hanging wash.

I heard a muffled response, something along the lines of 'okay'. Then I set to work.

The Universe is a vast and funny place. You put out a message and weeks, months, sometimes years later, you get a response. And that's exactly what happened. I pulled up a profile of all houses for sale within a five-mile radius so the kids wouldn't have to change schools. Out popped the most magnificent house I'd ever seen.

According to author of The Cosmic Ordering Service, Bärbel Mohr, we need to get really specific about what we want and violà! It appears. We quickly made an appointment with the realtor, who walked us through the house the same day. Walking along the promenade, then seeing the view of the Alps, I knew this was the place for us. It had absolutely everything I had asked for: two sinks in the bathroom; two full baths; a bidet (that wish is related to an erstwhile Italian vacation on the Adriatic shore...); a winter garden spanning two floors; my own office. When the owner pointed out where he had hung his hammock, I could visualize the ease and grace of living there. It was even located in the very street in which I had always wanted to live in our same town.

To top it off?

The bank is pleading with us to finance with them. Huh? I'm amazed. Utterly amazed. Even better. The realtor gave me a copy of Bärbel's book. One of my top wishes for 2007 has been fulfilled. I am excited to see what 2008 brings next!

When my son's stain is such a pain!

Picture it. Your nicely clad son decides on an impromptu soccer game in the newly rain-drenched yard. Whose face is redder? The soccer player's or his mom's? Yup. You guessed it. Maman is none too pleased.

The good news is Mary Zeitler, Whirpool's home economist at their Institute for Fabric Science, came to my rescue. I asked her pointed questions, thinking she might buckle under the pressure of my pressing queries. No, no. Mary proved to be as tough as nails. I feel sorry for those stains. They don't stand a chance under her gaze.

CLH: Is it important to react quickly when your toddler smudges ketchup on her shirt or can you remove the stain hours later just as easily?

MARY: It's always best to treat a stain as soon as possible. If nothing else, rinsing the stain under running water will help dilute it. Line dry or lay the garment flat to dry until laundering.  There are also pre-treat sprays and sticks that can be applied to the stain until you can throw it in the washer. Be sure to follow the directions on the label.

CLH: What products do you recommend to remove grass or blood stains?

MARY

: Both blood and grass stains are bleachable. For colors, use an oxygen based, or color-safe bleach.  For whites, liquid chlorine bleach can be used. You can also dab a little liquid detergent directly on the stains for improved results. There are stain removers available for specific stains that work well, too. They are located in the detergent aisles of your grocery store. 

CLH: How do you go about removing stains without stressing the fabric?

MARY: There is little reason to stress the fabric when attempting to remove stains. Stain sticks, sprays and detergents can be applied without stressing the fabric. If there is excess stain material, like bubblegum or candle wax, gently scrape it off with a dull butter knife or spoon. If the scraping appears to be stretching the fabric, soak it until it softens and can be scraped off without damaging the fabric. Take advantage of soaking, and stain removal products so scraping and scrubbing are not necessary.

Additionally, I have also included a better summary of some of the products that we currently have available.

For the Laundry Room:

-          The Pure Power of Steam: The Duet® Steam laundry pair naturally steams out stains wrinkles and odors in just minutes without pre-treating or chemicals. MSRP: $1499-1599 for the washer and $1199-1299 for the dryer.

-          Heaps of Laundry in a Hurry: The ENERGY STAR® qualified Whirlpool® Cabrio™ HE washer can wash three baskets of laundry in a single load. MSRP: $699-999 for the washer and $749-849 for the dryer.

-          Streamline Your Laundry: The Laundry 1-2-3™ custom laundry suite (laundry towers, pedestals and work surfaces) provides solutions for organizing, sorting, treating and folding. MSRP: $169-$299.

-          Reduce Dry Cleaning: The Whirlpool® Fabric Freshener relaxes wrinkles and removes odors in under 30 minutes. MSRP: $199.

-          Laundry Lifestyle:  For those in need of a laundry makeover, check out the Perfect Match laundry selection guide to determine which laundry pair is right for you.